Aim for Dead Growth

With the exception of the holidays, I really hate winter.  It's cold.  In Atlanta everything becomes grey and trees drop their leaves... Our grass goes dormant... It's just ugly and miserable to be outside... Then along comes late February and we get teased between ice storms and snow storms about what is to come... In the past week the ornamental plums and magnolias started to bloom and green leaves began to sprout from the ground... can Spring finally be here?  Piedmont Park fills with people on days where it reaches 70'.  We all feel excitement for the potential of Winters breath to finally be gone again.  As I run through the streets I see the buds on the trees and fields starting to sprout with the bulbs planted so optimistically in the Fall.  It brings warmth to my heart and soul.  I AM happy.

I spent the morning purging the dead growth of the last 1.5 years.  It was the albatross that kept my soul dormant this past year.  I purged everything in my office and on my downstairs desk.  There is a distinct lack of clutter everywhere.  I went and shipped my boxes with a big grin on my face.  I AM free.

I spent this afternoon in my garden with the 70' sun on my face and shoulders.  I cleared a small section of the garden in the time I had.  In clearing all of winter's dead growth I found all the bulbs that are beginning to grow.  I felt pure joy in deadheading the winter away...  (See the stack of dead leaves in front of the newly mulched section of my garden above)

A new acquaintance said to me recently "I really dig your peaches"... and I laughed...  Today in my garden I kept finding myself singing

"You're the cutest thing that I ever did see
I really love your peaches, want to shake your tree
Lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey all the time
Oee baby, I'll sure show you a good time

'Cause I'm a picker, I'm a grinner
I'm a lover and I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun"...

I thought to myself in my moment of bliss...  I really dig my peaches too... I dig myself... I AM a good person... and it's so nice to have the time to reflect upon that.  My joie de vivre is returning and I AM feeling really good...  The dead growth around me has disappeared over the last two weeks... I AM feeling really optimistic about the future.  As I took away the dead growth of the garden I found my first daffodil of 2014 and grinned even larger.  Daffodils are Gods message to you that life is eternal and love is ever lasting.  Even when things are looking dismal all you have to do is sit, wait and pray/reflect on your life and Spring will return to your life again.

"Birds flying high you know how I feel

Sun in the sky you know how I feel

Breeze driftin' on by you know how I feel

It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good"...

 

Aim for Stress

My blog rises from the ashes to be dusted off and resumed...

I have spent the last week counting my blessings.  Over and over I have seen how God gives things to you as you can handle them.  Things happen for a reason and when they happen there is a purpose in His message.

A year and a half ago I took on the task of fighting for the coworkers I love.  For those of you that know me well you know that I love with my heart and trust more than I should... I care about things too much Mark says... I don't know how not to care.  I spent a year and a half of sleepless nights waking up at two in the morning trying to solve the worlds problems while being beat up from all sides.  I loved being able to help my friends, yet the stress was eating me up.  I didn't have time to run and gained 20 lbs.  I worked 24/7 and slept little.  I haven't had a true vacation in two years as my downtime has been at UMass getting my Masters Degree.  My stress was affecting everyone in my life, yet I'm not a quitter so I fought on to keep doing the job to the best of my abilities... each morning taking one step forward.  Last week I was told my position was over 6 months early due to lack of funds.  I slept that night and every night since.  I've run 5 miles a day and have lost 13 pounds.  I am happy again.  To whomever thought they were hurting me by pulling those funds... Thank you.  While I'm disturbed that my group has lost representation at the negotiations table, I am at peace and have found myself again.  So again.  Thank you for the blessing of peace.

I am blessed because during that year of stress I met one of my closest girlfriends.  She of the "Don't let the Maybelline fool ya" claim to fame.  She's strong, and beautiful inside and out and tells it like it is so you better be tough enough to listen to the truth.  Her and Mammache are what I take away from the year and I am incredibly thankful.

I am blessed because I'm surrounded by many amazing women here in GA.  They are all strong and ferociously loyal.  What would my life be without Mormons and New Yorkers?  Empty that's for sure.  Love you guys.

I am blessed because I am loved.  I see it and feel it daily. I know what love is and I know it's not always easy.

I am blessed because my children are happy and healthy. I'd be a little more blessed if the lil cyclones of dirty clothes and dishes learned to clean up after themselves just a wee bit more... ;)

Because I count my blessings I volunteer for charity when I can... whether it's fundraising for a run, a walk, or any other charity events, I believe in giving back as much as possible.  Thus I was happy as a pig in mud last night when I was able to doll up and join the volunteers for the Red Dress Party raising money for the American Heart Association.  An amazing event put on by a small group of people.  I'm thankful to have been allowed to be a part of it.  I've been smiling ear to ear all day looking at the pictures of the event.

I am blessed that because I was at the event I ran into a friend I haven't seen in a few years... she mentioned that she used to read my blogs all the time.... and I realized, hey, I'm not in my position any longer... I can write til my little heart bursts with happiness... I so miss writing... So today I start again... and I'm grateful.

Now because I know
God listens... I'm going to go take my blessings and count them in a hot bath with a glass of wine and savor the moment... and because I can't sit anywhere without my mind a racing, I'm going to talk to God about how I can increase my blessings by finding enough spare cash to have a matching SLO cuff to go with my amazing SLO necklace that I rocked on the red carpet last night with my Maybelline Queens.  Sisters in SLO baby...

Life... is... good.  Peace out!

Aim For The Finish Line

What an amazing weekend!  The weather, the event, the activities before and after, the support of teammates and most importantly the support and time spent with the love of my life.  I couldn't ask for anything more.  I keep looking at the pictures as they are posted on various sites... I grin and my heart swells with gratitude for all my blessings.

Friday evening we arrived in Savannah and rushed to the race expo to grab our race bibs and swag.  The weather is perfect - 70's with a light breeze,  Returning to River Street, we sat on the upper decks of the ferry basking in the sun and enjoying one of the last perfect fall days we'll experience before winter hits the south.  We grabbed a beer and walked down the cobblestone street listening to musicians and grinning like only those truly content can do.

The team dinner was inspirational.  This event raised just under $500,000 for the American Cancer Society.  The Atlanta team, I'm proud to say, raised $120,000 of that.  We were all jazzed up and ready to go, excited to finally be in Savannah and achieving all the goals we set for ourselves back in June.  On a cool side note, one of our guest speakers was Andi Powell.  I spoke to her for a little bit afterwards.  She's very sweet and passionate about life... and she's Sasha in the next Twilight movie.  That should impress my kids.

I went to sleep early Friday night.  Determined to do nothing to effect my race the next day.  Clothes were laid out, accessories placed next to the clothes.  The morning was forecast to be chilly.  Layers were put together.  Hand warmer packages (thank you Target for $1 deal) put with my phone and Gu next to my running belt.  I was... READY!

I spent alot of time before the race talking to one of my new friends and teammates.  It was her first race ever... first time she'd ever run in her life was when she began training for this event.  She was nervous so I was giving her the pep talk and telling her to just ENJOY... take it all in.  Another teammate told her not to think about why she was there til after she crossed the finish line... that he'd done that a few months back in another race and started hyperventilating and nearly passed out... I thought to myself that "I'm not one to hyperventilate, thank god, but good advice Kevin..."

As the sun came up and the racers gathered in their corrals I was grateful for so many reasons.  To be there.  To know that I could do this race.  To have the love of my life by my side running it with me in support of me and my need to fight cancer with every event I can.  Until there's a cure I will not step off this soap box.   I was (and am still) so proud of my teams efforts, in fundraising and in training to do this run. 

Our wave finally is released and we're off.  Each mile I'm looking at the official clock and smiling.  My goal is to finish this race without stopping, and with a 10-11 minute mile pace.  My 5k split is 30:52.  That's a pace of just under a 10 minute mile... My 10k split is 1:03:21... a 10:16 minute mile pace... (and better than my Peachtree race)... Around mile 8-9 my right knee starts to give out.  I feel it and tell my sweetheart and keep going.  Focusing on the event and the run but keeping a mental eye on what's happening in that knee... Praying that I will not be forced to stop.  At 10 miles I'm at 1:46... I'm still managing under an 11 minute mile pace by a hair.  I lost my pace the last two miles.  Especially mile 12.  I'm apologizing to my sweetheart as I'm grimacing and continuing to run.  I tell him to just talk.  I need to hear his voice and focus on it.  He points out the moss in the trees.  The people rooting for us.  That we are almost there.  I'm listening to this life line while I'm screaming in pain in my head and telling myself I WILL finish this.  I CAN do this.  PUSH!  I hear someone playing Wilson Philips "Hold on for one more day", and I try to sing the lyrics "I know that there is pain but ya hold on for one more day and break free from the pain"...  My left knee is starting to give because I've been babying my right knee for 4 miles and I know I'm in bad shape.

We get into the corral that will lead us to the finish line and as we turn into the final 100 yards and I see the finish line I think "OMG I MADE it... For all these people..."  and I start to hyperventilate like my buddy Kevin told Emily not to do... and I have enough brain power left in me to think "so this is what he was talking about"... while my boo is telling me "We're almost there, you've got to smile!  The cameras are going to be on you shortly..."  ok... camera's... finish line... breathe... I shake my head yes and thank god for my big glasses that are hiding my tears and I grab his hand as we run under the photographers and across the finish line... After we cross I jump onto him with a big hug of thanks and love and nearly collapse as my legs start to freeze and buckle...

We walk through all the water stations and I grab one of everything, knowing every bottle of water, Gatorade, or anything that resembles liquid handed to me will be downed in the next 20 minutes.  We look for the DetermiNation tent.  He sees it and I tell him I need to keep walking.  I know I can't stop yet.  I feel like I did after cross country in high school.  I know when a cramp is going to terrorize my calves if I stop.  We walk by a medical tent and he asks if I want to get my legs iced.  "I'm NOT going into a medical tent, I'm tougher than that"... and maybe a bit thick skulled but it was the principal of the matter.  My day is not ending with medics.

We hang outside the DetermiNation tent, basking in the sun, eating the yummy food provided and greeting people with big hugs as they make their way to the tent.  We are all thrilled for our accomplishments.  Now it's all about a glorious day in Savannah.  Our team has a trolley tour reserved and we're going on it.  We had a fabulous time with 30 members of our team and their families.  We're all one big family now, wondering which race to do next together.  I tell them about my two 5k's I have planned and I think I sold one or two people on them.  We laugh and joke as the tour guide shows us the best of Savannah... and as we get off the trolley we all look perplexed as our legs don't work right.  Not one of us walked down the stairs of the trolley without tremendous effort.  It was humorous... We grin and don't care... It's time for beer and dinner... and THEN maybe some ice on the legs when no one is looking.

The next day I put my 13.1 sticker that I've had since June on my bag... I earned it baby!  Go DetermiNation Team Atlanta and Go ME!

 post script:

 Race plans... I have two 5ks and a 15k planned over the next 3 months... They are all 'fun runs'...

Continuing the battle against Cancer...  My next event is Forsyth County's Relay For Life (also an American Cancer Society event)... I'm on the steering committee and I'm an honorary chairman...  I'll blog about that in the future...

 Peace Out!

Aim For Leaks (Roh Roh Shaggy)

 The last two days of our Orlando mini trip were fun and filled with love and laughter.  Saturday we spent by the pool of our condo building.  A 3 story water slide kept the kids busy for hours while I read by the pool soaking up the last bits of sun before Fall sets it's chilly face upon the US.

Sunday morning we woke up relatively early and drove for an hour to spend time with my cousin April.  Love her to death...  We are sisters from another mother and have been since we were 16.  Our lives have separated and returned on a 5 year basis for many years now... ships passing in the night... she's an animal trainer, and my job is never in the same town... To find each other in the same state, let alone the same town is a minor miracle worthy of a lotto ticket purchase...

April is the dare devil... the one that reaches for all life offers.... She hang glides, flies ultra lights, zip lines across whatever mountain ridge you give her a chance...

When she found out the kids and I were in Florida, she invited us to the airfield where her ultralight "dragon fly" is kept.  The kids and I drove to the air strip, not realizing the adventure coming upon us... We turn onto the street that heads us to the airport and I stop as I see the pavement end.  "Um April, I hear violins, where do I go?" I text...

"I'm in the white plane.  I see you, stay where you are."

"What plane?  What airfield?"  As the plane lands and pulls up on the grass.  That takes 'airFIELD' to a new level for me.  I'm used to long PAVED runways... not large fields of mowed grass.

She talks me into flying with her... Katie does an immediate HELL NO and CJ balks an hour later...  Its a beautiful day for flying and I'm loving the view the ultra light affords... As we land she laughs and says "I only heard one 'OH SHIT!' out of you... well done!"

We wander with the dogs to the lake/pond.  The kids spend an hour or so playing on the rope swing as April and I catch up.  CJ braves the swing for a bit before Katie decides to share and join him.  The dogs bark and chew pine cones and periodically dip in the lake.

 I tease April about her friends retriever show dog looking like a hot mess after the lake.  The greyhound, which you can see in the next Beverly Hills Chihuahua movie, never looks wet or tired... A happy dog that's full of energy and affection.

Energy and affection is our family history... that and bellies full of laughter...  CJ decided he wanted to take the paddle boat out into the lake... April told him to go ahead... Look carefully at the picture of Katie swinging above... Do you see an issue beginning to unfold...?  April notices it and, of course, tells me to pull out my camera as she's starting to laugh hysterically.

Apparently there's a leak in the paddle boat that she thought was a slow filling one.  Next thing we know his boat is playing the final scenes of the Titanic... April is laughing, I'm singing "My Heart Will Go On"... and a friend of April's valiantly hops into a canoe to save CJ.  The friend capsizes his canoe about 5' away from shore and we both fall over laughing as the guy rights the canoe and says 'That's never happened to me before"...

"My knight in shining armor!  You rush to save my son!  I'm so SECURE in your ability to bring him back to safety...  NOT!  CJ start SWIMMING!" and I fall over in another fit of laughter with April by my side guffawing...

CJ is rescued, the paddle boat is upright and dragged back to shore.

Katie gives up on the rope swing and her new buddy teaches her how to drive an ATV... this she does with abandon all over the edges of the airfield.... 

We head out an hour later... With promises to visit April again in 5 years... Hopefully we'll see her sooner... If we don't... April, I love you... Thanks for the memories and for being the coolest cousin EVER. 

Aim For Vacation

When I started my new job last month I had to give up the two weeks of vacation I had in October and December.  As I sold back my vacation, I requested today off so I could do something with my kids during their fall break.  One thing led to another and we ended up heading to Orlando, FL for a 3.5 day weekend.

The kids and I both have to be back home by Sunday night, so we didn't use my flight benefits.  We drove nearly 9 hours yesterday down to Orlando, and will do the return drive late Sunday.  Listening to a book on tape, time has flown.  We are all riveted the moment the car turns on.  Even the few minutes driving from our condo to Universal Studios, not a moment is wasted.  "Turn on the tape mommy"... 

So far the time share we are staying at is nice.  The rooms are clean and large, the two pools look well kept.  Tomorrow we'll be hanging by the pools while waiting to spend some time with my cousin that lives here.

Today was spent at Universal Studios.  Last time we were here the Harry Potter section was incomplete, so we chose to do this part of the park today.  Hogwarts was fabulous.  Very well done.

We spent 6 hours at the park.  Til everyone was tired and worn out.  From Poseidon to Hogwarts to Toons to Jurassic Park... Every inch of the park was covered.  The kids have pretty much outgrown this sort of theme park.  Some parts were cool or scary, but a large portion of it was 'cheesy' in their eyes.

After doing the Jurassic Park water ride they chose to hang out at the splash zone for the ride.  In the boat it didn't feel like we had that large of a splash... but watching the boats come, it was pretty clear that we underestimated the size.

Wandering Toon town, was like revisiting my child hood.  Betty Boop, Pogo, Beatle Bailey, and Flash Gordon.  None of these toons are still in newspapers today.

I've been on the go for the last four weeks... two weeks away at training, and other visiting the bases.  It's nice having this time with my kids, just the three of us to reconnect away from home... We're all exhausted now.  Sitting in different parts of the condo staring at our laptops...  bed time is rapidly approaching.

Tomorrow is another day of fun in the sun.  I'm looking forward to it.  I'm so blessed to be able to be here with my two babies that tower over me now...  I know that in a few short years it will be hard to get them in the same spot for a day, let alone a weekend.  It's a birthday present to me, that will provide memories of a life time for all of us.

I'm fading now... peace out and love to all!

Aim for Lethargy

I am blessed. There is not a single doubt in my mind.  Some days my blessings are positively overwhelming in their abundance. This morning I woke up in Bangor, Maine. The sun was streaming across my bed.  As I fought consciousness, I peaked at the time and stretched. I had nowhere to be before 4pm and I lay in one of the most comfortable hotel beds ever.  Finally I got up and peered outside.  The view from my hotel window began a grin that that stayed with me all day... The sky was blue, the river was gorgeous.  The inspiration to run was in front of me.

I ran 5 miles, following the river as I went.  Running past Victorians and Salt Box homes, and grinning like a mad woman.  During my run it occurred to me that in 4 days I had put in 22 miles of training.  My runs are getting faster, easier, and longer.  Today the weather was perfect, topping off at 75'.  I could have run farther but as I ran I made other plans.

I returned to my room with a burning need to go back out again.  I showered and did what I always do... Went for a long walk around the town thru which I just finished running.   I wanted to look closer at the history and homes of today's 'modern' Bangor.  Cataloging my memories by taking pictures on every other corner.  I knew I'd be blogging my day, because perfect days like this deserve an honorable mention.

As I walked through the town I received a slurry of texts from a friend who is in a new relationship.  We both feel this guy is a keeper.  I'm sending her back sage advice on how to make it work.  How once you decide that this person is "it", you have to put your ego and pride to the side and focus on your end goal.  Where your norm during tough times might be to say "bite me" and walk away, your new norm must be to ask yourself each time who you are hurting by letting your ego talk for you.  Her response was "I get it.  It's better to be happy than right all the time"... Exactly!

Days end... in a new hotel room, in a new city (Houston)... I'm curled up in a large decently appointed bed... I reread the text that was waiting for me when I turned on my phone... My man had sent it to say how much he loves me, how he thinks about me all the time, and asked if I have a clue how much I truly mean to him...

Yeah baby... I know... Thank you for finishing my day with the ultimate reminder of how blessed I am.  <3

Inspire me more! Donate to my 1/2 marathon by clicking HERE. Help others be blessed today. :)

Aim For Critics

I was blessed to have two late reports on my last work pairing (trip).  This enabled me to run 5 miles each morning before I got ready for work.  I ran in Fayetteville, NW Arkansas, along a long flat road, and in Chattanooga, TN, I headed for the hills.  I found the road kill along the way amusing.  Only in the south will you run past dead armadillo and snakes.  Made me wonder what was lurking in the bushes and high grass fields I was running by.

My captain, for this trip, remarked at how 'shocked' the trees looked in both cities due to the drought.  Both times I agreed with him, but it struck me how I had never noticed the trees during my runs as I had been looking down.  I remembered smiling at all the delicate ground cover...  little purple floss flowers... sweet potato vines... star flower... and more...  Drought?  What drought?  Signs of drought are there to be found but I wasn't looking for it, therefore I didn't see the ugliness he saw.

On the plane day two, it came out that both the captain and I are... are you ready for this?  Liberals.  I laughed at the captain and said "A liberal in the flight deck?  It can't be!" 

The FO said, "I'm sorry, we can't be friends now."  Of course we all laughed...

I was telling this story to my boo later that night and he pointed out that is a difference between liberals and conservatives.  Liberals amass friends from all walks of life because they respect and accept different opinions.  Conservatives will write you off for being a liberal bleeding heart.  What my FO said, you'd never hear out of liberal's mouth.

I guess that's why I fit the bleeding heart liberal image.  I hear drought and how bad things are and I look and see the beauty still around me.  I have left my mind and heart open to finding beauty everywhere and in everyone.

I'm rewarded with a multitude of blessings... including finding a $20 bill on one of those runs.  It's been donated to the American Cancer Society... under the 'from', I put "God".  I figure if rain is a blessing from God for the drought, then finding money during my training run on a Sunday is his way of saying "You GO girl!  Count me IN!"...

If you want to join God the link to donate follows... ;D

I'm doing the hard part, running 13.1... You can do the easy part by clicking here now and donating!